He’s kinda cute.
[Clicks picture. Views more pictures.]
He’s cute but looks a little weird.
[Oh. He’s online. Click to chat. Small talk.]
Then it begins…
Him: Can I ask you a question?
Him: I don’t want to ask. You may feel some type of way.
Me: Well, you won’t know if you don’t ask. And we won’t know if I’ll feel a type of way if you don’t ask.
Him: It’s been over 10 months since I’ve been in a relationship. Do you ever get in the mood?
Me: Of course. It’s human. [How old is he? 3? Now more skeptical than before.]
[More small talk as I jokingly antagonize him about the wife beaters he had on in his pic. Sexy, much?]
Him: I wanna talk sexy to you, but… (I can’t remember what he said)
Me: [Online guys are pervs] Yeah, it may be better that you don’t.
[Block.] [Reports him to the division of all things inappropriate.]
Too drastic? I’m not really in the market for cyber sex. Go make nice with a computer mouse.
And then there was the guy with his top off on 3/5 of his pics looking like all things over-the-top sexy. Dude, put on a shirt.
**All exaggeration intended for your comedic relief. Carry on.**