I Found My Voice When I Stopped Looking For It…

It’s funny how we go through life trying to “find ourselves.” Even funnier is the fact that we try to find ourselves by looking at others. Whether it’s our parents, family, friends, classmates, teachers, people at church, or someone in the media, we often try to understand who we are through the our perceived comprehension of someone else. We play dress up as adults, imitating societal makeup and fashion trends as we did of our parents when we were children. We pick up slang and attitudes based on who we are and how we want to be perceived. We even fashion our careers, habits, and even hobbies through our perception of others.

I must admit…this blog has taken many different spins. And, beyond that, this isn’t my first blog. There were others – one personal, one professional. I’m sure I’m not the only one who can attest to that truth. I mean, really. How many people can one person really be?

I’ve been Lady (childhood nick name), Regina, Gina P, Dimples and Dribble. These are all names I’ll admit to. And every one of them have had significant meaning to me and to the people who have called me by those names.

Gina P. is the hip-hop Gina from high school. My brother loves her. He wants her back so much.

Dimples is the sweet, fun-loving Regina. This name was given to me by my best friend in high school.

Regina is the academic/brain.

Lady is the sassy little lady. I carried that name in my younger years. My dad said he sae me as a little lady…and that’s where my nick name arose.

Dribble…this was given to me by a close friend in college, and each person in our clique referred to me as that. We all had special names. And by special, I don’t mean always admirable 🙂

I digressed.

The point is that we take on many faces. But when I look back, all these faces were actually realities. Regina or Gina is a sweet, academic, brainy, sassy, witty, fun-loving lady. Each name represented a part of who I am.

When I started this blog, I wanted to be like other bloggers. I wasn’t exactly sure who I was or what I would talk about. Would I be a beauty guru? Would I be a person of comedy? This is what the “people” like, right?

No. People like authenticity. The fact that you’re funny or pretty or fashionable or super smart or so on isn’t what creates staying power. Your looks or other key feature may have attracted them, but it’s knowing they’ll get consistency from you is what keeps them coming back for more.

I re-branded my blog (for lack of better words) last year. Actually, around this same time. I gave up on being someone else or trying so hard to get others to like me. Instead, I started focusing on matters of my heart. I began focusing on racism and depression and work life balance and self-esteem and so much more – because that is my reality. Those are things I’ve struggled with and still struggle with at times – some more than others. And, while it may be hard at times…and i may be scared at times, this blog is about helping others while I embrace my journey.

Sometimes I wish I could be a beauty guru, but that’s just not who I am…and i no longer have to try to pretend. And I no longer have to look to be funny – because the good Lord knows I have enough humor in me without even trying. But most of all, I no longer have to understand who I am through my perception of others. I am who I am. This blog has helped me unravel that.

I literally found my voice when I stopped looking for it and just started telling MY story.

Stay true,

Mission: Providing hope for the hopeless.
Vision: Away with “I can’t”.

P.S. – It’s funny how you can write an entire post with an ounce of inspiration. Now back to that food I was warming up 🙂


  1. Hi. My name is Elva, and my siblings call me Elbo-usually means they are happy to see me-for me it is totally a family thing. I don’t usually tell this to others. But it is who I am when I am with them. Glad you found some clarity for yourself. Great post.

    1. Nice to meet you, Elva. Thanks for that nice comment. I totally get it – being who you are when you’re with your family. My family tends to bring out the funny in me…and the honest too (but it doesn’t take a lot to get the honest going) 🙂

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