How often do you hear of someone hem and haw over spare time. I mean, with the busyness of life, one often looks forward to a bit of spare time…down time…time where schedules aren’t dictated by hectic deadlines, children’s activities or even volunteer work.
I’ll raise my hand. There are several times when I look forward to this said down time.
However, I must admit…too much spare time, and I start going a bit bonkers. Not only am I plagued with boredom, spare time – time not filled with others or activities – is an almost instant trigger of my anxiety and depression. In fact, it’s one of my leading triggers to the point that when I’m with family, I’ll sometimes dread going home knowing that I’ll be entering a “dark, lifeless,” home.
At least that’s what it feels like to me. And when I’m there, it feels like I simply exist.
That’s the bad news.
The good news is that I’ve identified the issue. This is why I call it my nemesis…
According to Google, “nemesis” is defined as…
- the inescapable agent of someone’s or something’s downfall.
- a long-standing rival; an archenemy
- a downfall caused by an inescapable agent.
While I like with each of those definitions, I’m going to have to deny numbers one and three simply due to one word, “inescapable.”
Inescapable is a word of defeat. I don’t believe neither I — or you — have to stay that way.
I can find power in this journey. Some days will be good, some not so much. But it won’t be inescapable. And to make it more manageable…even to overpower “the agent”— or said arch nemesis— I believe it’s necessary to devise a plan.
I’ve deemed this plan, “Fill the hole.” Or maybe I’ll call it “Operation Fill the Hole.” I like that better.
This is where I actively work to ensure I fill gaps in my time with something productive. Whether that be by blogging, playing an instrument, learning a new language, working out or something else, it’s essential that I don’t allow too much time to go unoccupied; time where my mind can start thinking about how lonely I am or how sad life is or how I’m just existing.
That only leads to tears and frowns.
I’m all about that smile, that smile, that smile; no frownin’. *In my Meghan Trainor, All About that Bass, voice*
Like I said, 2015 is where I get my life back.No more just laying down and taking it. And I’m not playing.
Providing hope to the hopeless
Eliminating “I can’t”